Programmer defines a whole new level of lazy (and smart) with his own hacks

Metaphor about the inefficiency of workers in the workplace during working hours.


Nihad Abbasov, a  programmer known as “Narkoz” on the famous software sharing website GitHub, posted  a funny yet ultimately useful software scripts that has been circling around the internet.


Apparently, the project was from one of his coworkers who left for another company. It contains some scripts that had some hilarious NSFW names to them and automates different actions including getting coffee. When the said guy had left the company, his previous coworkers looked through his works and discovered his amazing software scripts that automated actions concerning his job and personal relationships.


Abbasov described his former coworker as the kind of guy that automates just about everything or anything that would require 90 seconds of his time. The guy came up with script that sends a text message to his wife, “late at work” and “automatically picks reasons” from a list of presets. This activity would take place every time there is an activity with his login on the company’s computer servers after 9 pm.


If he isn’t at work and logged in to the servers at 8:45 am, a script would automatically run and send out emails saying, “not feeling well, working from home.” This script was apparently called “hangover”.


Another script is responsible for relating to a customer he didn’t like. It scans his inbox for any email from the said customer that uses words like “help,” “trouble,” and “sorry.” After which, it automatically rolls the guy’s database to the latest back up to send a reply; “No worries mate, be careful next time.”



His previous coworkers, including Abbasov were surprised by this guy’s creativity. However, the most amazing script he ever came up was something that hacks into the coffee machine and orders it to brew a latter after waiting for 17 seconds. Then, the script tells the machine to wait for another 24 seconds before pouring the latter in a cup. This process takes the exact time for the guy to walk from his desk to the coffee machine and get coffee.



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